Freedom, Independence… Anyone?

So what’s the plan this year?

It’s independence day.
It’s a day off.
A time to celebrate, just like any other day…
I know I hate it too when we get a national day off during weekends…
What to do? We have too many such days and events in our yearly calender and the list now is just too endearing.

So what have you decided this year?

Like last year watch lots of theme based shows on all national TV, Surf a lot on your remote, take off with your family to a restaurant for a nice and sumptuous lunch followed by some shopping

God, aren’t we tired of doing the same old thing over and again?

I mean we have one and what are we doing with it?

Independence has become such a clichéd word now!
We use it over and again and abuse it to the max…

What have we done within us and around having got any independence?
Can you name one thing that you feel you have done worthwhile using the independence that you have got today?

Go to a school… you’ll find teachers teaching the same old history, geography etc etc. Our kids are expected to know the date when Gandhiji started the Dandi march and broke the salt act or whatever it was for whatever the cause. I mean it’s all good. Really good to know but who gives a damn if the date is mentioned wrongly by the student? 1 mark gone. Someone wrote it correctly. Someone wrote it wrong. Our Indian curriculum expects you to score full marks even with that God forsaken correct date. But no one cares to tell or ask students to think what if that particular incident didn’t happen? Or maybe a scenario where you alter the possibilities and allow kids to come up with their own analysis on a given situation. Don’t you think that would make the kid go through pages in history, understand the facts and then arrive at their own inferences? No wonder, most of us are so bad when it comes to knowing what happened during those times… our past.. our history…. No wonder we are still harvesting book worms rather than brains that is most desparately needed in these competitive times.

Come home, a parent expects kids to be someone. Some person.
Doctor, Engineers are the most common of all. Kids are not supposed to be what they want to be. They are supposed to be what their parents want them to be.
Do we watch what our kid is doing intently? Maybe a drawing, reading, narrating, reciting or anything that lets a spark and makes you think “Hey I guess my kid could become a good musician?”
But no! We immediately assign a price tag to their dreams.
“Nah, it’s too cheap”
“No scope in that”
“Not another AR Rahman”
“You will only end up running here and there”

How many times have we dismissed our kids right to their dreams?
How rare have we followed it?
To make it even worse, we rave about our neighbour’s kid having too ambitious dreams and on the contrary shoo our own kid’s thoughts!

Have we ever aimed our kids to be the most prolific writer in the world, or maybe a scientist or even a cricketer like Sachin Tendulkar?

Why are we so stuck to some basic achievable dreams that suit our pockets more than the eyes and hearts of our kids?

Why shouldn’t we aim higher?
Why should we shy away from those dreams?
Do we think those dreams are smaller?

I am yet to see a kid of today who knows what he wants to become when he grows up. Whatever he/ she says its all a sound box relayed from their parents rather than their own.

So what true independence have we all achieved if we haven’t given that basic requirement to our children when it comes to their future?

What’s the point in celebrating it when we don’t know to use it fully?
Only that day will be the day we finally get our independence. Until then it is all the same except that we are the oppressors and our kids the slaves.

Can we see a day when we can live the dreams that our kids want?

I would surely say yes, that day isn’t far behind. Times are changing so are our thoughts and outlook towards life.

Let’s give what we didn’t get. Let’s make our children what we couldn’t achieve.

Happy Independence day!

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Children’s day

This is a guest post by Priya Q who blogs regularly at www.composedvolcano.com

circle-children

June 1 is the designated International Children’s day while Universal Children’s day is on the November 20. Over 50 countries celebrate a local Children’s day on various dates and in India we do it on November 14. On this day most schools have a morning assembly where lots of programs & lots of speeches on children’s rights, well being,… etc. are delivered. Politicians also make lots of promises for the coming future!!

However, here I am contemplating on the growing years of kids today. Why do I feel that the kids are maturing at a much faster rate than what it used to be? Why do I get a feeling when I talk to kids today that the innate innocence which accentuated the beauty of a child is fading? A small poll amongst many of my friend’s highlights one such point that – kids talk like adults these days and even try to do things which they think is cool!! (Like speaking on Mobile phones, SMSing other kids,…etc.)

children

Let me share an old article that appeared in the newspaper long time ago…. And is one of my favorites.

When I look at a patch of dandelions, I see a bunch of weeds that are going to take over my garden. My kids see flowers for Mom and blowing white fluff you can wish on.

When I look at an old drunk and he smiles at me, I see a smelly, dirty person who probably wants money and I look away. My kids see someone smiling at them and they smile right back.

When I hear music I love, I know I can’t carry a tune and don’t have much rhythm so I sit selfconsciously and listen. My kids feel the beat and move to it. They sing out the words. If they don’t know them, they make up their own.

When I feel wind on my face, I brace myself against it. I feel it messing up my hair and pulling me back when I walk. My kids close their eyes, spread their arms and fly with it, until they fall to the ground laughing.

When I pray, I say thee and thou and grant me this, give me that. My kids say, “Hi God,! Thanks for my toys and my friends. Please keep the bad dreams away tonight. Sorry I don’t want to go to heaven yet. I would miss my Mommy and Daddy.”

When I see a mud puddle I step around it. I see muddy shoes and dirty carpets. My kids sit in it. They see dams to build, rivers to cross, and worms to play with.

Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize that they were the big things.

How things have changed today! And who is to be blamed?

The whole education system today has changed. There is competition on every front. Today even a 3 year old is expected to face a rigorous interview for admission to a good nursery. (Forget the fact that you have to cough up 20k-50k for the admission anyways!!) You need to be good if not the best to stand a decent footing. Kids are forced to join extra curricular classes post their school hours without regarding their interest levels. May be parents find it fancier to talk about it in their peer circle? I don’t know! There are comparisons made knowingly and sometime inadvertently. And mind you me, the kids are watching and picking up those traits. Even a 3 year old has a comparison to make between his house and his friends’, his toys vis-à-vis his friends’!!

Today I find it quite common that parents provide for their child each and every thing that was a luxury hard earned for them in their childhood days. In my days, we had to do something special or do something extra to earn a gift / toy / book. Today most kids just have to ask!! And now I find parents with unique problems too. Their kids just do not want to play out with their friends. Physical activities are on the down slide. It’s a virtual age and virtual world of gaming is what is more fascinating. And thanks to parents the kids today have the best of electronic gadgets to flaunt. There is absolutely no regard for money. Added to all this kids today do not think twice before demanding for atrocious useless stuff and most parents give in to their demands too. After all they don’t want their kids to feel let down in front of their friends. Aren’t things coming too easy for the kids? I don’t know!

All I know that all of us have trapped ourselves into this vicious cycle; coming out of it can only happen with conscious collective efforts.

I sincerely hope that we go back to the times when we can give back the innocence and the get genuine smiles to their sweet little faces…and let them just be! Minus any burdens and pressures which will get to them some day but not for now!

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Happy children’s day!!!

children

I don’t know how to start this post. Really.

I mean where do I begin and how do I end?
And what do I write in between?

There’s so much to talk and write about when it comes to kids.

Before I begin the begin…

My hearty wishes to all my married friends who are proud parents, about-to-be-parents, planning for kid’s couples and all the kids a very very happy and fun filled children’s day!

There’s so much to do for our kids to keep them happy and make them cherish these moments forever.

However I and few of my blogger friends have a few wishes for all the children of this world.

Karthik’s wish (www.outofthemold.com)

Dad: Son, I am going on a long tour for the next five days. Do you need anything when I return home?
Son: Bring me some freedom, Dad. Bring democracy to our house and replace it with your dictatorship. Bring some knowledge to share with us. Give me some freedom. I know to sleep when I am sleepy but I am forced to. I know to eat when hungry but I am fed. When I can walk in the rain I was only allowed to watch. I love music but I was joined in a karate class. I am grown up from a toddler to a student but I also want you to grow up with me, with my emotions and thoughts.
I don’t need quality in things I have but equality in my nation. I am very upset to see the children outside my school picking waste papers. I want them to come to school with me. Dad, I want you to spend time and not money. I don’t want to fold my hands before you but hold your hands and jump in front of this world.
Can I get these when you return home????
These words from a 10 year old child are penned by a 260 month child.

Priya’s wish (www.composedvolcano.com)
I feel really sad for the kids today. Quite unintentionally, parents today burden their kids; and why not?… the education system today demands it. There is fierce competition at every level and you are expected to perform so as to be in the game! Kids are forced to take up extra curricular activities not based on their caliber and interest level; but just because they need to have “an edge.” I hardly find kids playing out. They are happy with cartoons and video games whenever they get time off their “busy” school schedules that is! It’s a topic of concern amongst my friends who feel that the kids are growing faster. They behave and talk like adults. Gone are the days when kids had to work hard to earn a goodie. Today they just have to demand! On this Children’s day, I wish to see kids nurtured as they were meant to be devoid of any pressure. A day where kids appreciate and take pride in their toys than demanding and taking money for granted. A day a kid cracks a silly innocent joke than trying to look mature. A day kid tugs to his mother’s sari seeking permission to play out in the rain …I guess I wish to see innocent smiles on innocent faces back again.

Raj’s wish
I had a dream ever since I was a child. I lost both my parents to cancer and that triggered that thought in me that I will adopt a kid when I grow up. I am an NRI and it’s not an easy task to adopt children. Or should I say NRI’s are given almost 6th preference when it comes to adoption. We were given all sorts of promises from various contacts and friends but I guess luck was not on our side. We also realized (And we hope it’s true) that there is a lot more demand these days than the availability of kids in the orphanages. But one fact remains is that there are a lot many parents ready to come out in the open and not feel shy for adopting an underprivileged kid.
I guess this is only the beginning! And that’s a great change I am seeing these days.
I sincerely wish that there are enough parents to come out in the open to take these kids and give these kids a life that they deserve.
I also wish, pray and hope with all my heart that God give me the opportunity to meet parents such who need that encouragement and I am there for such parents.
And maybe someday, sometime in the distant future every kid has a parent, someone they can truly depend on!

What would you wish for children’s day?

This post would not have been possible without the inputs of Karthik and Priya. Best wishes from all of us to all our readers!

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